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I don't think Sophie likes me.  我觉得苏菲不喜欢我

What are you talking about? She loves you.  你瞎说什么，她可喜欢你了

No. I don't think she has a blind spot.  她眼睛并非有盲点而看不见

I think she has a blonde spot... for me.  完全就只是单纯对我有意见

Well, I think we've found the place where red bulls come to die. 我觉得我们找到红牛墓场了

Man, why do I never get invited to parties like this?  真是的，怎么都没人邀请我来这种派对呢

Look. Do you know what that means?  快看，知道这意味着什么吗

Yeah, this building has a real shirt shortage.  知道，这栋楼极度缺少上衣

Oh, my God, do you think this might be the Abercrombie model's apartment? 天啊，你觉得这会是AF模特的公寓吗

I doubt it's the Abercrombie model's apartment.  我持怀疑态度

Here's a note. It's addressed to "Cleaning dood," "Dude" Spelled "D-o-o-d." 还给咱们留了张条，是给"清洁土人"，把"工人"写成"土人"

It definitely might be the Abercrombie model's apartment.  这肯定是模特儿的公寓啦

"Wake me when you get here." He wants us to wake him. "来了就叫醒我吧"，他说让咱们叫醒他呢

So, do you think he sleeps in the nude?  你觉得他是裸睡吗

Yeah, "Nood", "N-o-o-d."  对，"果睡"，"赤果果"

Come on, let's go look.  快走，咱们去看看

Oh, oh, oh, so what, seeing this guy naked is no longer an "uncomfortable work environment"? 哎哟，所以现在看这个家伙的裸体就不算是"不舒服的工作环境"吗

It's still uncomfortable, but in that exciting uncomfortable way. 还是不舒服啊，不过是爽得让人不舒服

I think it is him.  我觉得就是他了

It's the guy who put the "abs" In Abercrombie. And he's naked. The good naked. 在AF广告中露腹肌的那个人。而且他裸睡，撩人的裸体啊

Should we lift the sheet?  我们该把床单撩起来吗

Why not? I already lifted it in my mind.  此时不撩更待何时，我心里早把它撩开了

Max, I got this. You start cleaning up the mess out there. 麦克斯，这里交给我吧。你开始打扫外面吧

No, you start cleaning the mess out there... I got this.  不，你去打扫外面，我来处理这里

The bedroom's attached to the bathroom, and I always do the bathrooms, and he's my ideal type. 卧室连着厕所，我总是打扫厕所，而且他还是我喜欢的类型

And by "doing" the bathrooms do you mean flooding them, and by "Ideal type," do you mean unconscious? 你说的"打扫"厕所，是指让厕所发大水吗，"喜欢的类型"是指不省人事的吗

We can talk about this out here. You're going to wake him. 我们去外面说。你会弄醒他的

That's what we're supposed to do.  叫醒他本来就是活的一部分

But as usual, you don't want to do the job.  不过你一如往常，不想干活

What's wrong with you? You're acting weird.  你怎么了，今天这么奇怪

Well, why should I have to do all the heavy lifting while you just get to nap and see free model penis? 为什么我要干所有的重活，而你又能小睡，又能免费"赏鸟"

All the heavy lifting? Where'd you get that from?  所有的重活，谁说的

No one. Sophie. 没谁。苏菲

I knew she didn't like me.  我就知道她不喜欢我

It's not that she doesn't like you, she just doesn't think you're... 这跟她喜不喜欢你无关，她觉得你...

What? Doing anything? She thinks I'm not pulling my weight? She thinks I'm a dead weight? 怎么，一事无成吗？她觉得我没有出力吗？她觉得我是累赘是吧

Not dead weight, more like... a rock... to my balloon. 不是累赘，更像是...石头，而我是气球

What is that, some kind of Polish haiku?  那是什么鬼，某种波兰俳句吗

What does that even mean?  那到底什么意思啊

She thinks if I cut the rock loose, I'll go...  她觉得我如果剪断绑石头的绳子，我就能...

Wait, so you're siding with a woman you met a week ago over me? 所以你要抛下我，去跟一个才认识一周的女人结盟吗

I'm not siding with anyone. I'm just saying...  我没有跟任何人结盟，我只是说...

I know what this is. This is "pick on the rich girl." It's a poverty smackdown. 我懂了，就是"百般刁难富家女"嘛。这是穷人的自卑心作祟

I heard you two talking while I was in her bathroom, spritz spritzing. 我在她厕所打扫时，就听见你俩说话了，左喷喷右喷喷

You think you do everything? Fine, do everything. 你觉得所有的活都是你干的。好啊，那你全干吧

You can "balloon" All over this place, 'cause the "rock" Is leaving. 这地方全归你这"气球"，因为我这块"石头"要走了