[00:00.44]If Only I Had Known... 假如当初我知道就好了 [00:05.80]Thomas Carlyle lived from 1795 until 1881. [00:12.69]He was a Scot essayist and historian. [00:16.09]During his lifetime he became one of the world's greatest writers. [00:20.90]But he was a human and humans make mistakes. [00:24.94]On October 17, 1826, Carlyle married his secretary Jane Welsh. [00:32.16]She was an intelligent, [00:34.16]attractive and somewhat temperamental daughter of a well-to-do doctor. [00:38.95]They had their quarrels and misunderstandings, [00:41.92]but still loved each other dearly. [00:44.32]After their marriage, Jane continued to serve as his secretary. [00:48.80]But, after several years of marriage, Jane became ill. [00:52.73]Being a hard worker, Carlyle became so absorbed in his writings [00:57.87]that he let Jane continue working for several weeks after she became ill. [01:03.23]She had cancer, and though it was one of the slow growing kind, [01:08.50]she finally became confined to her bed. [01:12.00]Although Carlyle loved her dearly, [01:14.52]he very seldom found time to stay with her long. [01:17.78]He was busy with his work. [01:20.19]When Jane died they carried her to the cemetery for the service. [01:24.89]The day was a miserable day. [01:27.08]It was raining hard and the mud was deep. [01:30.03]Following the funeral Carlyle went back to his home. [01:33.64]He was taking it pretty hard. [01:35.83]He went up the stairs to Jane's room [01:38.68]and sat down in the chair next to her bed. [01:41.62]He sat there thinking about how little time he had spent with her [01:45.45]and wishing so much he had a chance to do it differently. [01:49.28]Noticing her diary on a table beside the bed, [01:52.71]he picked it up and began to read it. [01:55.29]Suddenly he seemed shocked. He saw it. [01:59.45]There, on one page, she had written a single line. [02:03.28]“Yesterday he spent an hour with me and it was like heaven; [02:08.05]I love him so.” [02:09.62]Something dawned on him that he had not noticed before. [02:13.89]He had been too busy to notice that he meant so much to her. [02:18.48]He thought of all the times he had gone about his work [02:22.12]without thinking about and noticing her. [02:24.49]Then Carlyle turned the page in the diary. [02:27.78]There he noticed she had written some words that broke his heart. [02:31.82]“I have listened all day to hear his steps in the hall, [02:35.54]but now it is late and I guess he won't come today.” [02:39.26]Carlyle read a little more in the book. [02:42.44]Then he threw it down and ran out of the house. [02:46.04]Some of his friends found him at the grave, [02:49.43]his face buried in the mud. His eyes were red from weeping. [02:54.02]Tears continued to roll down his cheeks. [02:57.31]He kept repeating over and over again, [03:00.37]“If I only had known, if only I had known.” [03:04.37]But it was too late for Carlyle. She was dead. [03:08.08]After Jane's death, Carlyle made little attempt to write again. [03:13.00]The historian says he lived another 15 years, [03:17.15]“weary, bored and a partial recluse.” [03:20.11]I share the story with in the hope [03:22.95]that you will not make the same mistake. [03:25.58]While our loved ones must have the money we make to live, [03:29.73]it is the love we have that they really want. [03:33.26]Give it now before it is too late.

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