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Unit 78

The Senior Prom -- Adulthood Ceremony

As the school year winds down, many senior students of school across the nation will not just be starting another summer of holidays to provide a break during semesters. Many will be leaving their safe havens of senior public school and taking their first step into the world of adulthood, attending fast-paced, crowded universities, taking up part-time or full-time employment. Many may even move from family homes in their pursuit of educational fulfillment or the "perfect" job opportunity. Many young people are preparing to move on to new lives in the world, with new responsibilities, new environments, new peers and new dreams.

One ritual that has become part of coming of age has been the senior prom. Just before the graduation ceremonies of many high schools, or following closely behind graduation events, the senior prom is an opportunity for youth to celebrate the entrance into the world of adulthood with color and formality. However, there is far more behind the social event than ever noticed.

What is formal? Formal means to present one's self to others in a way which is "with form", with shape, polite, inoffensive and dignified. We see the example of a formal letter, it uses proper grammar and sentence structure in order to be respectful, while at the same time serving a purpose or getting an important message across.

In our society, what is formal? Very little. On average, clothing, language, behavior -- all is very informal. Individuals who are formal (polite, inoffensive, organized) in their daily dealings with people are often looked upon as boring. Yet in certain situations, individuals play with the concept of formality not truly to achieve respectfulness and order but because it becomes fashionable to do so. While a prom may seem, on the surface, like a fun opportunity to behave formally, it is actually a flowery version of Halloween.

On the occasion of the spring prom, we see flowering youth taking on the formalities of "adult". Fine dress (most of the students who attend the senior prom rent expensive tuxedoes) or purchase high quality suits or gowns for the occasion), careful makeup (spending hours in front of a mirror or at a hair salon in order to look just right), fancy toys (limousines line the streets outside of dance halls on the night of the prom) all become part of being an adult. In many ways, adults in society should examine their own behavior for wrongly displaying these types of objects as being "adult" to younger people.

In our society we have a wrong idea of what adulthood actually is. It has always been my understanding that adulthood and maturity are not based upon one's ability to hold a cigarette in a certain way or tie a bow tie. Adulthood comes with understanding of one's place in the universe; it comes with the knowledge of how to interact with our fellow human beings; it comes with the ability to take responsibility for one's own actions -- whether good or bad.