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Unit 15

Levels of Communication (2)

Evaluative communication: Offering opinions, ideas and judgments to others. This is risky business because the odds are that others will give their own evaluations, which may be different from yours. When people always use evaluative communication, they must be prepared for conflict. Many U.S. Americans enjoy sharing at this level and feel that disagreeing with others is useful and invigorating. Unfortunately, many of us don't use evaluative communication with a high level of competence. It's important to consider the value of critical and creative thinking, as well as the relational meanings of messages that are exchanged. When using evaluative communication, consider carefully the importance of descriptive and responsible expressions. Try to avoid warnings, sarcasms, and nonverbal put-downs (e.g., rolling your eyes in response to another's comments).

eg:Of all my children, my daughter is the better athlete.

I thought that movie was excellent, particularly with the surprising ending.

I'm not convinced that your argument is well supported.

I agree with you!

Emotional communication: involves sharing our emotions and feelings with another. We are sharing our inner-self when we allow others to know our heart. This is risky business! Societies place constraints upon the specific emotions (e.g., It's good to express love; it's bad to express hatred). We also have rules about when and how feelings can be expressed ("That was the wrong time and place for arguing with your wife.")

eg:I deeply appreciate your thoughtfulness and generosity in helping me earlier.

I'm so frustrated with you!

I wish that I hadn't called you that name. I hope that you'll forgive me.

He called me! I'm so excited to see him again!

The greater the need to communicate our feelings, the harder it is to do. Indeed, sharing our opinions and emotions is risky business. We minimize the risk when we move through the levels of communication step by step. That is, each conversation ought to begin with phatic communication and move through the levels before moving to the more intimate levels.

Generally, we communicate at the same level. There is a social convention to match levels. If the other starts a conversation at the evaluative level, we often feel compelled to respond similarly.