There Are No Mistakes, OnIy Lessons　没有错误，只有教训

·Richie·

Human growth is a process of experimentation, trial, and error, ultimately leading to wisdom. Each time you choose to trust yourself and take action, you can never quite be certain how the situation will turn out.Sometimes you are victorious, and sometimes you become disillusioned.The failed experiments, however, are no less valuable than the experiments that ultimately prove successful；in fact, you usually learn more from your perceived“failures”than you do from your perceived“successes”.

If you have made what you perceive to be a mistake, or failed to live up to your own expectations, you will most likely put up a barrier between your essence and the part of you that is the aIIeged wrong-doer. However, perceiving past actions as mistakes implies guilt and blame, and it is not possible to learn anything meaningful while you are engaged in blaming.Therefore, forgiveness is required when you are harshly judging yourself.

Forgiveness is the act of erasing an emotional debt. There are four kinds of forgiveness：

The first is beginner forgiveness for yourself.

The second kind of forgiveness is beginner forgiveness for another.

The third kind of forgiveness is advanced forgiveness of yourself. This is for serious transgressions, the ones you carry with deep shame.When you do something that violates your own values and ethics, you create a chasm between your standards and your actual behavior.In such a case, you need to work very hard at forgiving yourself for these deeds so that you can close this chasm and realign with the best part of yourself.This does not mean that you should rush to forgive yourself or not feel regret or remorse；but waIIowing in these feelings for a protracted period of time is not healthy, and punishing yourself excessively will only create a bigger gap between you and your ethics.

The last and perhaps most difficult one is the advanced forgiveness of another. At some time of our life, you may have been severeIy wronged or hurt by another person to such a degree that forgiveness seems impossible.However, harboring resentment and revenge fantasies only keeps you trapped in victimhood.Under such a circumstance, you should force yourself to see the bigger picture, by so doing, you will be able to shift the focus away from the anger and resentment.It is only through forgiveness that you can erase wrongdoing and clean the memory.When you can finally release the situation, you may come to see it as a necessary part of your growth.

里奇

人的成长是一个不断尝试、不断经历失误，又不断获得新知的过程。每次，当你信心十足并准备采取行动时，对于会有什么样的结果，你无从知晓——或许成功，或许失败。然而，失败并不意味着毫无价值。事实上，我们往往能从失败中学到比成功中更多的东西。

假如你犯了一个错误，或是未达到自己所期望的标准，你很可能会在真我与所谓的犯错者之间构筑一道壁垒。然而，对以往的行为全盘否定，势必会让你感到内疚、自责。当你深陷其中时，就不可能从中汲取到有益的东西。因此，过分苛求自己时，最需要的就是自我宽恕。

宽恕就是放下情感上的包袱，抹平心灵上的创伤。它有四种类型：

第一种是对自己的初级宽恕。

第二种是对他人的初级宽恕。

第三种是对自己更深层次的宽恕。这种宽恕是针对自己深感羞愧的极大恶行而言。如果你所做的事有悖于自己的价值观和道德观，这时，你就在自己的为人准则和实际行动间制造了一道裂痕。在这种情况下，你就必须努力悔改，以此来弥补过错，并要重新找到自我。当然，这并不是说你可以随意地原谅自己，毫无悔改之意，但一味地埋怨自己是不健康的，过分的自我惩罚只会让你偏离自己道德准则的轨道越来越远。

第四种可能是最难的一种宽恕——是对他人深层次的宽恕。生活中，你也许会受到极大的委屈和伤害，以此来看，这似乎是不可原谅的。但是，心怀怨恨、企图报复只会使你陷于受伤害的阴影中。在这种情况下，你就要强迫自己放宽胸怀。只有这样，你才能把注意力从恼怒和仇恨中转移开来。只有做到宽恕，你才能忘却过错，净化心灵。于是，当你最终把自己解脱出来时，很自然地，你就会把它看成是成长过程中必不可少的一部分。

核心单词

aIIege[?'led?]v.断言，宣称

ethics['eθiks]n.伦理观；道德标准

waIIow['w?l?u]v.沉迷；纵乐

severeIy[si'vi?li]adv.严格地；严厉地；严重地

fantasy['f?nt?si]n.空想；幻想；梦想

wrongdoing['r??'du：i?]n.做坏事；犯罪

实用句型

Therefore, forgiveness is required when you are harshIy judging yourseIf.

因此，过分苛求自己时，最需要的就是自我宽恕。

①is required是一般现在时的被动语态，基本形式为 is\am\are+P.P.（过去分词）。

②forgiveness宽恕，饶恕，名词后缀ness加在形容词后构成抽象名词，类似的例子还有kindness 仁慈；tiredness 疲劳；happiness幸福，快乐，愉快；sadness 悲哀，悲伤等。

翻译练习

1.他的身份不亚于部长。（no less than）

2.他没有实行他宣布的原则。（live up to）

3.不要开小差，集中精力。（shift away from）